I am currently only be meant to be weighing myself once a week. Well ideally, not outside of counselling appointments at all, but because of the gaps between them (and my inability to wait that long!) we’ve settled on once a week.
Currently I’m weighing myself about 4/5 times a day. I’m not particularly bothered by the number, but it’s this weird curiosity about needing to know. I get that my weight fluctuates, but there’s something reassuring about knowing it at various points of the day. However my counsellor thinks this is just ED making excuses and I need to ignore it. I had managed to reduce it to a few times a week, or even less, over the past year but since I’ve been living on my own it has creeped back up.
My counsellor is adamant I need to take this step to show that I am committed to the process she is engaging me in. So, after two checks this morning I packaged up my scale and have tucked it away under the stairs.
I’m now getting into bed and automatically went to step in the scales, only to find them gone. Argh! I’m really bloated and really think I would feel better by checking my weight. I really want to dig them out, but I also want to show I can manage one day without them. I trust my counsellor and maybe if I’m struggling with even one day, just maybe she has a point?
So the scales and are taking a break until next Tuesday. I’ll miss you scales!’