I’m not sure if this will work or not – I may abandon this after a day or two- but I’m going to try and blog my 3 week structured eating mission. I have 3 weeks until my next counsellor appointment and I am committed (at least for now- wait until ED gets a wind of this plan!) to trying my hardest at my goals of structured eating. I’m not overly concerned with what I’m eating at the moment, just the regularity of it. I’m not going to post what I actually eat as I don’t want to be giving any readers’ ED gremlins comparison ammunition; I’ll just more be reflecting on how it went and identify challenges and successes. It will probably be boring for others to read, but if it has the potential to help me I’ll give anything a go
Breakfast- awesome, go me
Morning snack- was late as was at a work thing and didn’t want to eat my snack in front of people (something to work on but not for now). Felt okay about amount etc. though.
Lunch- ate this 40 mins ahead of schedule, so it was a bit too soon to snack. I wasn’t really hungry, I was just bored at my desk I think and wanted some distraction. I was meant to be working on something but I’d left it at home so was annoyed at myself. I think if my lunch bag had been in the fridge and not in my office I would have waited so tomorrow need to put lunch bag in fridge when I get in. Went for short gentle walk after lunch to distract myself from feeling full.
Afternoon snack- half an hour early but in line with lunch. Not particularly hungry, again a bit bored.
Unscheduled biscuits- they were in my drawer as they were leftover from a social event. I shouldn’t have them in my office and need to remove them. Not even sure why I ate them, don’t think I was hungry. Could definitely feel a binge coming on but stopped myself after 3 and then packed up to go home as hoped change of scenery would help and I knew I could’t binge as boyfriend at home. Went to shops on way home and bought stuff for dinner. Urge to binge had gone at this point- was a quick one amazingly- need to remember the urges do pass and to not get caught up in thinking a few biscuits is a binge.
Dinner- made a new recipe and it was yum even if I say so myself! Ate at table with boyfriend and packed us both a lunch for tomorrow with the leftovers. Had some dessert and now feel too full – need to leave some time between dinner and dessert to suss out how hungry I actually am. Could easily purge now, and am very tempted, but after being so sick on Monday I think my body would be taking a battering-plus I know I haven’t eaten ‘too much’ so I am blogging instead and going to distract myself with some study now.
All in all- things to work on but not a bad start!