I have an interview tomorrow which I really should be preparing for but I just tried on my ‘lucky dress’ (a smart plain black dress which I have worn to pretty much all of my interviews in life!) and it’s really tight. I know I shouldn’t let this bother me but I am kind of panicking now-argh!
I had thought that I must try on the dress yesterday as the last time I wore it I was a fair bit smaller but then reminded myself I had worn it for an interview about 3 years before that when I was at what I thought was the same size as now. It’s way tighter than it was last year, which I’m kind of okay with as I knew that would happen as I know I’ve put on weight and recovery is great yadda yadda yadda, but I’m horrified that it’s tighter than it was three years okay. It means I’m bigger than I thought now and all the fight I’ve been putting into accepting my body at it’s ‘set point’ has gone flying out the window. Now instead of just worrying about my interview performance I’m stressing about looking fat and feeling horribly uncomfortable. Yuck.
I can’t think of anything else to wear now and can’t face trying anything on so I’ve given up and put on pjs and I’m hiding in bed. I know it’s not the end of the world but man this recovery process is exhausting sometimes-I wish I could just step out of my body for a few days to not have to deal with it, bleurgh.