I moved in with my boyfriend this year. It’s been fantastic and I love that we’ve taken this step and made this commitment to each other. But…I have to admit it is hard work food-wise sometimes. He’s currently in the kitchen making dinner but all I really want to do is overeat chocolate and purge. I’m ashamed of myself that I’d prefer him to go out so I could left alone with ED.
I don’t know why this is and I’m feeling overwhelmed by the urges. I ate enough today so it’s not that. I did have to give someone some bad news so that’s bothering me a little and I’m tired which doesn’t help. I know riding out the urge will reduce their power and strengthen my ability to manage them in the future, but knowing that doesn’t make me feel any better about the urges right now.
I’m a bit grumpy about it all aren’t I?! I have a nice weekend ahead so just need to hold on through tonight and have faith in feeling better tomorrow. I have a lot to be thankful for and a lot to lose if I keep choosing ED, so I will keep on keeping on and go enjoy a pleasant evening with the boy.