I’m living with a boy

My boyfriend and I moved in together this week. I’ve never lived with a boyfriend before so this is a very big step. We talked about it for a while though and we know how serious we are about each other so we feel it’s the right decision.

It’s brilliant so far in terms of sharing our space and getting to see him more but the food thing has been hard. I had prepared myself somewhat for this in terms of getting myself to a place where I was well enough to live with him but I hadn’t really prepared myself for some of the nitty gritty details such as…

-he wants to eat dinner every night and doesn’t think just having a bowl of cereal or some carrots and hummus or something like that and then snacking later on is dinner. Apparently people really do eat proper cooked meals every day- yes I know this should not be a surprise but I was bemused by how strange I found this. I think this is going to be really good for me following my mea plan!

-I don’t have complete control of the ‘extras’ e.g. when he’s cooking he might just add in a dash of milk, or a pinch of salt, or salad dressing as he sees fit. I eliminated these kind of extras (sauces, dressings, thickeners etc.) years and years ago, and while I have managed to cope with them when eating out I am panicking about them becoming a regular part of my meals. I know this is something I’ll have to tackle though as it’s not fair on him to be eating my kind of food all the time

-portion size. I’m well aware that my very tall and active boyfriend needs to eat more than me and that we shouldn’t be having matching portion sizes, but I’ve struggled to judge what is the right amount for me. At home I eat everything out of the same bowl but when we moved in together we had a discussion that I wouldn’t do this in the new flat, so I’m learning about what is enough/ not enough/ too much. We’ve agreed I can dish out my own food but not be too obsessive about it.

-I have purged twice in the new place and have felt awful about it- like I’m really violating his trust. I can’t let my new home become somewhere I feel safe engaging in behaviours so I need to face that head on- it is never going to be acceptable.

Aside from these and a few other food things, co-habiting is amazing. I wasn’t sure I would ever find someone I loved enough to want to spend the rest of my life with or be well enough to do it so I am thankful that I made it to this point and that he came into my life. I do feel like one lucky girl this week 🙂

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2 thoughts on “I’m living with a boy

  1. I’m in the same place as you! My boyfriend and I have lived together for close to two years now and it was and still can be really rough food-wise. I’m just like you – I always thought it was strange to have three FULL meals a day. There are many days when I would just have veggies and some hummus or a small salad, but he wants to make a dinner together and add some of those “extras” that you mention! And as hard as this can be, food really does bring you together! Making meals together can be so fun! Stressful at times, but more times, so fun. I wish the best for you both 🙂

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  2. Congratulations! I found that when I moved in with the hubs my b/p episodes decreased drastically – we’ve always lived on a single floor, and the thought of him overhearing me purging was far too embarrassing (most of the time). Hopefully you get similar benefits, which it sounds like you will. Good luck!

    Liked by 1 person

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